


upstairs bathrooms

by AppleJuice (capolleon)



Category: Percy Jackson and the Olympians & Related Fandoms - All Media Types, The Heroes of Olympus - Rick Riordan
Genre: M/M, also leo lowkey thinks heras kind of hot, also leo needs to not pee while his bf is stressing, he literally refers to her as milf, hera is the step-mom, jason has step-mom problems, jason just needs support, not even lowkey
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-27
Updated: 2016-11-27
Packaged: 2018-09-02 12:59:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,083
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8668492
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/capolleon/pseuds/AppleJuice
Summary: For some reason, Jason's hiding in the bathroom during his family's Christmas party and Leo's got to go.





	

**Author's Note:**

> what happens when you want to avoid major cliches for the time being, but also have attention problems and no sense of planning. basically all my stories.
> 
> hera is jason's milf step mom if you cant figure it out ~~i mean the queen of the gods must be sexy af to be queen you know what im sayin~~
> 
> also support closeted people because they need support. its always nice to be helpful and supportive and grateful to others and if you don't understand, that than i don't know how to help
> 
> disclaimer: i dont own pjo and/or any of its characters
> 
> stay cool my friends and keep writing/reading :D

His knuckles rapped on the door for another few more rapid knocks.

“No.”

“ _Jaaason_ ,” Leo whined, pounding his fists on the door. “Get out the bathroom!”

“I’m using it.”

Leo thumped his head on it. “But I have to _gooooo_. It’s not going to be all sunshine and rainbows if I use it right here. Do you know what I had for lunch today?”

An awkward cough. Through the white wood, Leo could hear shuffling around. “This is my parent’s bathroom.”

“You mom has those fancy sprays if I _really_ have to go, just lemme  in.” Leo kicked the door, and squeezing his legs even closer. “I swear, Grace, I _will_ piss on this carpet.”

The lock of the door popped, and the door was pushed inward. Leo fumbled with his belt buckling, before yanking down the zipper. To his side, Jason was sitting on the edge of the bath tub, averting his eyes.

The Grace’s bathroom had way too many bottles, from deodorant to soaps. The colorful bottles were fancy and expensive looking, but were the closest things to making the bathroom seem more… common. Even the toilet paper looked to be worth more than Leo’s entire house. Jason fit in, with his cute little vest and fancy shoes.

“So,” Leo _really_ had a lot of liquids in his body. “Why are you hiding from your family’s Christmas party?”

Jason’s cheeks burned. “Do you really have to ask that as you’re… y’know.”

Leo shrugged, his pee trickling from less of a waterfall to a delicate stream. He shuddered, instantly regretting that analogy- the thought of water made him want to be even _more_. They wallowed in silence.

“Jeez,” Jason’s voice cracked. “Which ocean did you _drink_?”

“Hey,” Leo was pretty much done now, and was already stuffing himself back into his pants. “A man’s got to do, what a man’s got to do. And eating a Ghost Pepper is not something a man should do even for 50 bucks.”

Jason turned on the sink. “Why’d you do something like that, when I give you money all the time? As boyfriends, I don’t mind.”

“But that’s different! I want to _earn_ my money! And Percy’s been looking for someone to show him up lately.” Leo rubbed his hands together. “He can’t even handle hot sauce, that dumb idiot.”

“Ghost Peppers are hot. You could’ve gotten heartburn or worse.” Jason warned. He sat back on the tub edge. The shower curtains crinkled to the side.

“Meh,” Leo waved his wet hand in the air, spraying water around. He collapsed on to the toilet cover, which was a fuzzy brown thing. “You only say that because the hottest thing you’ve ever tasted was your step-mom’s burnt eggs. Speaking of, we’re going to pick up Chinese later, it was a stupid decision to make let that woman cook for Christmas dinner.”

“It’s to kill all our relatives.” Jason rubbed his face in his hands. He groaned. “Father’s going to get in a fight like he normally does. The couch is going to get thrown out the window like last time. Uncle D’s going to get drunk and puke on Thalia again.”

“Damn,” Leo snickered. “I want to see that.”

“ _Leo_.”

“Sorry, babe.” Leo turned serious. “Is that why you were hiding out in the bathroom for the past hour? To avoid getting hit by a flying couch slash become a puke bag?”

“No.” Jason rolled his eyes, and ran a hand through his perfect hair. “My step-mother doesn’t know you’re my boyfriend, and she’s not exactly sane nor accepting.”

Leo shrugged. “My dad ignored me for months when I came out. Not that he spoke much to me in the first place- but still. Now we’re pretty cool, I guess.”

Jason’s fingers thumped on his thigh. “She kicked Thalia out for two weeks when she said she wasn’t interested in dating anyone.”

“Damn.” Leo scrunched up his nose. “Your MILF step-mom sure has some problems. Feisty.”

“ _Leo_.”

“Sorry.” Leo cracked his knuckles nervously. He stood up, running a hand over his wrinkled button down. “Well who cares, what she says! I say, we run into the kitchen, kick her ass then makeout right in front of her kind-of hot face and say fuck you!” Leo stuck out his hand for Jason to grab.

Jason rolled his eyes but smiled nonetheless. He accepted the hand, and was pulled up. “Leo.” Jason kissed his forehead. “We can’t just kick my step-mother’s ass.”

“You’re right.” Leo’s eyes furrowed. “It might be fake and fall off- no matter how sexy, not that I ever look at it, even if it’s a passing glance ‘cause sometimes she just bends over right in front of me whenever I’m over here and a man can’t fight his instincts-”

“Leo,” Jason pecked him on the lips, and ran his hands through Leo’s curls, trying to manage it as best as he could. Leo wasn't exactly the neatest person in the world.“Sometimes you ramble and ramble, and I’m also thinking you think my step-mother might be kind of hot.”

“Not as hot as you, _mi media naranja_ ,” Leo wiggled his eyebrows. “Even if she’s total MILF material.”

There was small knock on the door.

Jason rolled his eyes, and let out a breath of relief, untangling his hands from Leo’s hair. “I think I’m fine now. With introducing you as my boyfriend that is. My family’s known you since we were little, and if they have a problem, then they could suck it.” He reached for the door, ready to pull it open.

“That’s the spirit,” Leo slapped a hand on Jason’s back. “Way to go, buddy. Besides, we’ve been in this bathroom for half an hour by now, I think they’ll already know by now. Suspiciously hot and sexy boys in the bathroom for a long time sounds like a very interesting porno.”

“What-” Jason was pushed out the door, by Leo. Right outside the door, was a sitting Thalia, who smelled like the familiar sting of puke. Thalia smirked weakly up at her brother.

“Hey, Jason?”

Jason covered his nose, and Leo gagged at the smell, pretending to die. “Yeah?”

“You and Leo are cute. And Leo?” Thalia winked. “Our step-mom is like three times your age, it’s gross.”

Leo stuck out his tongue. “I don’t need Jason’s hot mommy, when I have Jason, himself so pbbt.”

Jason just rolled his eyes, and pulled Leo downstairs to the party. He was ready.

**Author's Note:**

> oh wow guys can you believe that its dec already wow my birthday is coming up
> 
> can you believe dec 16 is coming wow i wonder what that day is
> 
> omg how could i ever forget, its my birthday nudgenudgeNUDGE
> 
> oh mi gosh it would be so great if i could read some nifty fanfics for my very special day
> 
>  
> 
> ~~*subtly* encourages people to gift me some valgrace birthday fics for my birthday~~
> 
>  
> 
> wow would you just believe that


End file.
